Tag Archives: single

5 things which would be easier if I wasn’t single

Not sure how all you singletons feel all the time about doing everything on your own. I certainly am quite independent and confident but I was thinking yesterday about the following things that would just be easier if there was more than one of you. 

So I believe the following would be easier if you were in a relationship:

  1. Going to events
  2. Sharing bills
  3. Sharing chores
  4. Hang time
  5. Life admin

So let me explain them..

Going to events

I do not mind going to parties and events on my own, however sometimes going to an event where it is full of couples or families and then little old me turns up on my own and looks like billy no mates – isn’t fun. My other bug bare is that you always have to drive and never get the option to drink at one of these do’s, which would clearly make things better sometimes! Haha! Obviously I could be that annoying spare part who could stay over at people’s but that’s just annoying and ruins everyone’s weekends! 

Sharing bills

When you have to be an adult and it is socially unacceptable to live at the rents, you have to either rent or buy a place. I brought my first property at 26 & admittedly my parents were very helpful in the beginning but you know I think they always thought I might meet someone who might eventually share my bills. Instead I had to work hard in my career to pay those pesky bills. I’d like to buy more designer handbags each year though and not have to think – pay back new kitchen or buy something nice for me. Plus paying a mortgage of over £900 a month is a lot for one person. 

Sharing chores

I know there is only one of me but regardless of how many people in a household, you still have to clean the same space and do all the same chores. Having to clean, cut the grass, take the bins out, cook every night (ok I don’t stay in every night but that’s not the point!) dust, Hoover, food shop (so boring when you are gluten free) etc etc.. It would just be nice not too have to work all week and have to do all this sometimes too.

Hang time

I like my own company, I sound really boring but staying in sometimes, cooking dinner and watching tele or a movie is nice. I also like going shopping on my own etc, but sometimes, just sometimes I’d like to hang with someone and not have to call on a friend or make an effort and just have someone at home to chill with. 

Life admin

OMG does anyone like life admin? Seriously I have enough admin at work to do let alone have to work out what remortgage I am going for, whether Henry the cat should have annual injections or cat insurance, book tickets for the cinema, pay bills, work out what home, car, life etc insurance is best. The list goes on! This week I have had to look for the best deal on car tyres and brakes. It’s a chore and yes my dad is taking my car to have these things done, but I still had to price compare garages as he doesn’t see this as a priority and would just go where his mate tells him is good regardless of the price. To me this is surely a boy job & if there was two of you  – this wouldn’t have to be done by me. Although a friend of mine had car issues this week and her husband was away and she had to deal with a bit of the issue, but no doubt her husband will do the rest when he is back. Not jealous at all – I’d have to fix the whole issue! It’s just annoying! Haha

Anyway these are my bug bares and yes I do realise boys who are single have to do everything too, lots of relationships aren’t more simple as one person will do more than the other and gay couples – have to still do boy or girl jobs anyway! What are your bug bares about being single? 

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Boomerang

So it’s happened again – guys from the past getting in touch because they are redic. 

Let me tell you my latest story and you are welcome to refer back to Randoms get back in touch as the same guy has got in touch again. 

Basically he was on tinder – so I swiped right just to see if he would too. He had. I messaged eventually “hey stranger, how are you?” He deleted his profile! Random! So I went into Facebook and did a little digging – looks like he might be seeing someone! Idiot! A week later, surprise surprise he pops up on tinder again with the message in his profile of: If we match again, I’ll message you, sorry! Clearly for me! I’m intrigued to find out what he is up to. We match! What a surprise! He messages his favourite Christmas movies (standing joke about Christmas movies) and I reply obviously telling him he is wrong. So I ask if he is single! Apparently he is. So I ask him why Facebook looks like he isn’t? He says he was seeing someone, not anymore, blah blah blah! It’s totally recent or he fucked up or something! By this point I’m just honest and tell him it’s odd! What do I have to lose! 

Anyway… 

After more messaging, He says fancy a drink? I’m like meh! Might as well… Wrongly or rightly – I’m nosey and want to find out what has happened and a night out might be fun! Haha! 

Drink day! I get a message saying he is terribly Sick with a cold and can’t make it! Clearly a lucky escape for me! 

That evening he is texting and tells me he is moving up north! Random – why meet for a drink but hey! He is also telling me I’m amazing, wish we were on a date and getting a bit flirty and pervy! Whatever it’s all funny to me. 

The next day – he is out with his mates by lunchtime! Clearly he wasn’t I’ll and decided nothing was going to happen on our supposed date. He starts basically saying to come over, i’m amazing in bed, amazing body, blah blah blah! Clearly I am far too sensible and say no, but a drink one night is still cool! 

The following week he is still being flirty and pretty much sexting! Still telling me I’m amazing etc. Then I mention the drink again and funnily he then tells me we want different things, he wants some fun before he goes up north and basically wants a shag! Makes out I’m desperate for a child and he can’t possibly have another one! Anyway I basically told him it wasn’t going to happen, he realised he fucked up and I told him – thanks for the blog post! Haha

The moral of the story is: leave it in the past! If it didn’t work out the first or second time – let’s not go for the third, forth or fifth go! Boys don’t change and there is a reason it never worked out originally anyway! Yes we do want different things! 

Stay tuned for the next instalment of “mister won’t leave it alone” in about a years times! 😂

Life of an awesome Auntie

I felt the need to blog today as I am a pretty amazing auntie, but this week it’s been totally random due to my Neices and Nephew and my fake Neices and Nephews. 

I have 2 real Neices and 1 nephew, 10,6 & 3 – my mum calls them the wild bunch and the description is far off what they are. They are pretty fab and as you might have read previously a nightmare too! Haha My best friends have children too (8 in total) one of best friends had a daughter when we were 20. She is now 17! How am I supposed to say I am 28 when she is now 17, it’s so depressing! If she gets married or has a child before me she is out of the will! Not that I have one, but that’s not the point. She did say the other day I could be her bridesmaid though! Plus with some of the other fake nephews hitting 15 – I really do need to get a move on! I need to make more dating effort I’m sure. 

This week started with one of my other best friends having a baby boy (#newcrewmember) which is pretty special and I can’t wait to meet him, then on Sunday the best friend with the 17 year old took us on a road trip to see a university! Seriously this is way too grown up! She is looking into doing forensic investigations – what a brilliant subject – on the open day we looked at finger prints – which was cool! I’m so thinking she can be like Dexter, but without being a serial killer obviously. Her brother who is 14 told me, he never realised how short I was. Brilliant – I’m so not that short! 

Tonight after working 12 hours I looked after the wild bunch, helped with maths homework (totally beyond me) and pretended I was alseep on the floor of the 3 year olds room to get him to go to sleep, all whilst pretending I was “live” tweeting from an event in Vegas. I then helped my sister with applying for secondary schools for my niece (those applications are so confusing!) and I sent my final email at 10.30 about an event in San Diego and need to send my final “live” event tweet before I fall asleep. In between all this today I have sorted out a new mortgage and spoke to the docs about a referral for B12 issues. 

The moral of the blog is – love your life, work hard, have fun, enjoy random moments and try and stop these children for growing up too quickly. 

Dates in 2017: 0 

Weight loss: 1 stone

Night all! 

2017 so far! 

I can only apologise for the lack of posts recently – I just haven’t had the omph to write one (although I have written one in my head a hundred times! )- plus I think this year has been a omph lacking year so far but let me tell you why! 

This year 5 people I am close to have lost parents and I’m not great with death and upset unfortunately and it just makes me freak out about my own parents, to whom I am very close to! firstly my best friend from uni’s dad died after a battle with cancer. I love my friend and her family and they have been through so much it’s heartbreaking to watch and when you want to support your friend it will effect you. Then my uncle died from a freak accident – he lived in northern Cyprus and to not be able to say goodbye or see your family at this time again takes its toll. However most recently another best friend lost her mum in not very nice circumstance and she really shouldn’t have gone so young. When you have a very similar relationship with your own mum, it literally upset me more than I could deem possible. My saving grace is I have both my parents – unfortunately my friend now has none. She also has battled with being single for years and yes now is in a nice relationship  but when you have been single for so long before, you worry about being alone again and you also get more upset that your parents won’t see you build this future with them included. Well this is how I would feel. I worry so much about it just being me – I rely on my parents so much for just being there regardless of how much I might have friends around or family. This is why I worry about my friends so much! I don’t want them to feel alone and I want them to know I am there for them.

Anyway to continue my 2017 story – a week after that death, another friend lost her mum and most recently a childhood friend lost her dad. It’s totally mental and I do know my parents are fit and healthy and seem much younger than they are, but it doesn’t stop me from being in this stupa this year. It doesn’t help that vitamins aren’t staying in my body (a side story to B12 deficiency) and I’m tired all the time or I feel the majority of my friends are the most self centred people  ever this year (obviously not including the people who have gone through this heart ache!) I get everyone has a life but seriously I give up trying sometimes. Maybe they feel I am self centre too or shouldn’t have to rely on them for company at this age who knows! 

So this brings me on to dating and why my lack of dating or even bothering to talk to anyone this year! I just don’t have the omph or the tolerance or have become so bloody old I give up for a bit! The thing is with dating you have to be at your best because it’s so hard. It takes a lot out of you, it’s exhausting and emotionally fucks up your head sometimes. A guy started an argument with me yesterday online because I didn’t reply to him and when he pushed it – I just said I think we are looking for different things to which he then just threw abuse  at me ! He clearly got blocked and anyone else I was talking to was looked at in a different light and not really spoken to again. I swear I attract fuckwits. 

So the rest of the year I can only hope gets better, I don’t dwell on the past and everyone starts to heal! Oh and I get some energy in me and vitamins somehow start to stick! 😬 Autumn is better for dates anyway! Haha 

What does an online profile say?

Obviously everyone goes by the photos to start with and if they look quite nice you open the profile fully and take a read! Every profile set up is slightly different depending on what site you are on! One might give you a compatibility score with a guy, one might let you tell them everything about you in terms of height (obviously most important thing to women), marriage material, just want a f**k buddy, no details, linked to your Facebook or Instagram profiles etc. Etc. But what does the profile say about that elusive potential….

  • So there is the guy who wants a lover but not love = clearly a fancy way of saying they want a f**k buddy and could be married already or perhaps has been hurt in the past and just wants a no commitment thing for now! Commitment issues… 😬
  • Then there is the guy who is seperated! These poor guys could have been seperated for years for all I know but I instantly think; is he on the rebound or is it too early for him to be going out and meeting someone! 
  • The guy who bangs on about looks not being important – sorry but surely that’s crap because the first thing you judge people on online is their photo! So for you to click further you need to go yep or nope to that person! Unless they look at every profile I suppose! Who knows! 
  • The guy who puts no details about their job! What are you trying to hide!? Who cares what you do – I can select that you earn a certain amount if I really want anyway and then you will come up in my search! Yes yes it’s that fickle online!  In a bar you wouldn’t ask someone how much money they earn before talking to them but on online you pretty much can!  Although that goes back to my previous post when I guy was so eager to find out how much I earn’t – who cares! 
  • The guy who says they come from the whole county! Is that not a bit weird! It instantly makes me think you live in a dodgy area and you are ashamed! Silly if you ask me! Plus counties are massive – Hampshire is like an hour drive to get to some places! Plus I live on the Berkshire, Surrey, Hampshire boarder – so giving me a county is redic! 
  • The I’m not telling if I have a child – clearly you have one
  • The I’m not telling if I have a car – clearly you don’t, but you might have a bike! Just say if you don’t have one! Weird not too! 

The only answer I think I get when people are a bit unsure is the kid thing and the marriage thing! No one wants to be too eager and not everyone knows if they want children and if it happens it happens especially as we all get so bloody old – who knows if we can have children or when we will meet someone if we will be really really bloody old and can’t have them by then! And marriage, well again you wouldn’t go up to a potential in a bar and go: “do you ever want to get married” might depend on the person or they just might not see the point! My parents have been married for over 45 years and I’m not sure I can be bothered to get married – what is the need really? A house is a commitment, children are commitment, but I would quite like a Pink diamond engagement ring! Mmmmm! Lol

Anyway it’s bloody difficult this perfect profile thing – maybe we (as in the online dating community) need to be more open minded on lots of profiles and just go with your gut on if that person seems like one you want to meet! To be fair you might start chatting to one and they end up being blah anyway (totally happened last week and he had such potential but bloody hell he asked no questions and didn’t do anything with his life! – bore) Boys can be a bit blah you know! Clearly it’s all them as I’m so funny, beautiful and amazing! Ha 

Anyway back to the boy shopping! Ooooo I just got a message from an Adam…..

Boys Opening messages – really? What’s wrong with hello! 

I get it it’s hard to start the ball rolling in any conversation but if you were in a pub and was talking to a girl would you start with: “I have really long foreskin – how do you feel about it?” If this situation happened – a) I’d hope I was very drunk and so was he and b) this so wouldn’t happen in a pub! So why does a guy online feel this is an appropriate opener!? Then he gets funny because I’m the most honest person in the world and I ask him (very politely) if he says this to all the girls and does he think this is appropriate! Anyway he blocked me! He also blocked me cause he insisted I got “kik” to message on! Urrmm I thought the whole point of online was that you had a platform to talk on before you gave out numbers! Why would I need kik as well! Clearly hiding something or he was embarrassed of being online! Anyway I don’t want kik! 

Another guy messaged me to ask if I missed sex! Very kind of him to think about me but no need! He did do the hi how are you first but then asked me who I lived with! Weird! I’m 37 – I’d like to think most people (if they don’t live in London or perhaps if they have baggage) would live on their own by now or maybe I just want to go out with some one who does! 

Another guy didn’t quite tell me this on an opening message but in a few exchanges after that his mum has cancer and she is dying! Wow why would you tell a stranger that! Is that not a bit too early! And far from romantic! 

Clearly I am attracting the wrong guys or guys in my area are so weird it’s rediculous! It is funny though because there is always the bondage guy who pops up and looks at your profile! He is looking for a new lady who he can dominate! Funny he doesn’t actually show a picture of himself encase “work colleagues” see! hmmm I think it’s just because he is a Middle Aged fat bold guy who you really wouldn’t want to go near! Random! 

Anyway back to it – who knows a nice one might come along or that random meet down the supermarket aisle is surely on the cards! 😂

Happy Friday

Random dating people 

In the past few weeks I think I have spoken to a lot of randoms! I felt I needed to document them as just to prove to the world I do try and meet guys but every random messages me! 

In no particular order: 

  • The guy who messaged with “Hey You’re a cutie!” I’m not being funny but I’m 37 on Friday! I’m far from being a 5 year old who is a cutie!
  • The same guy went on to make sexual comments and basically telling me we lived so close – he’ll get a bottle of wine and come over! Urmmm I haven’t met you on a date and we just said hello pretty much! He then blocked me! Weird
  • Another guy today asked me how much money I earned! I replied that I wasn’t sure if that was a question you should ask and he replied with “yeah it is – I earn xxx a year!. How much do you earn because I think I don’t earn enough!” So I earn double what he does and clearly I didn’t tell him but diplomatically pointed out it depends on industries etc! How is that an appropriate question to ask? 
  • Then there was the guy who message me at 10.15am Saturday morning with “hey” or something like that! Then at 10.36am he messaged “aren’t you a chatter” Then he blocked me! Seriously I went out for the day and was busy – I didn’t realise my whole aim for Saturday was to message a random back! 
  • Then there is just all the random messages like “You’re astonishingly good looking” (seriously) “Your beautiful, I could fall in love with your face” (Really?) Or “Wow your gorgeous!” I get they want to make a first impression but seriously how is that an opening line – a boring hello, how are you would be better in my book! 

So anyway with the amazing chat up line and guys lined up – my 37th birthday will definitely be one where I am single and happy about it if that’s all that is available! 😂