Wedding etiquette when you are single

I love weddings and I’m fortunate to usually have at least one a year! I have also been a bridesmaid 5 times and read readings and been a witness a few times too! I love being part of the special couples days and I love a good fascinator! I think I get invited to more weddings because I am single too – it’s easier to fit one more in a wedding than 2 & I have always declined taking a plus one anyway as I think people spend enough money on a wedding than having to pay more out on someone they don’t know! Plus can you imagine looking back on wedding photos and going oh yes that was so and so’s bit at the time or that was just a random who came with Lisa! Plus I have never majorly know people have space for extras at weddings anyway! Numbers are always limited! 

Overseas weddings can be tricky! One of my best friends got married in Santorini quite a few years back and there was never any question about a plus one, she just hooked me up with one of her other friends who would go on her own and who I sort of knew but didn’t know know and we were roomies! By the end of the holiday/wedding we were really goodfriends and now I would class her as one of my favourite people and a really close friend! 

Another wedding I went to was in the states, again no plus one and the brides had plans for everyone and were thinking of all people going, like who they could share with at the hen in Vegas, when people were getting there, who would stay with who at the family location and again who would then all share what accommodation at the wedding venue! It was so well organised you didn’t need a plus one and regardless of being in a couple or being on your own – everyone just had fun and there was always someone to talk to! My mum actually jumped on the bandwagon of the wedding and was invited in the end but didn’t come to all of it and regardless of her being there or not, I think the experience would have still been the same as it was a bunch of really nice people I barely knew from all over the world! 

I received a wedding invite on Friday for a wedding in South Africa next year and it says you can bring a plus one! Regardless of me not really believing in plus ones – I think I might need one on this occasion! It’s weird we are a group of friends & not everyone is in a couple but my other single friend is totally different to me and lining up a plus one where I actually probably don’t have anyone who could go! My friends are pretty much either married or have children or both! Plus SA isn’t like just popping to Spain! It’s a big holiday to expect friends of the happy couple to attend, let alone a random who doesn’t really know them! This is one instance where if you had a boyfriend it would be just something you wouldn’t even have to think about – you would both probably just go if you could afford it! 

So like normal I could just go stag which if anywhere else in the world I probably would, however the wedding venue is 2 hours from Cape Town, there doesn’t seem to be any set in stone plans or advice on how you are meant to get there except if people arrive on the same day – they could maybe car pool! I can’t just jump in a cab, I can’t organise some transfer as it is miles away and who knows if SA even does transfers and I can’t I presume as a single white female hire a car on my own to travel on dirt tracks (like the outback I presume) to get there! I’m sure my friends who are going could go on the same day and we then all travel together but the people I know are bridesmaids and the bridal party all have plans together! So I don’t want to be the spare wheel in that either! So this is my predicament right now and the only time really that I felt upset that I don’t have a partner to be there in this situation! Maybe my new tag line on these dating sites needs to be “I need a plus one for SA – who’s up for it?!” If anyone has any ideas – please let me know! I do have time to figure it out and obviously talk to the bride, as I do think it would be an amazing wedding and wouldn’t want to miss a friend getting married! We’ll see – as I say the invite only came in on Friday! 


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